May 2020 – Week 3
Welcome, My Beloved Perverts!!! 😀
I am glad you chose to join me in this new venture of mine, the one where I will send out a weekly mail with some kind of valuable content for you to consume. I am not entirely certain of what this will end up being, and I am sure all sorts of things will change along the way as I get more experienced and you guys share your feedback – but guess what? YOU are along for the ride from the very beginning! 🙂 So, let’s get this thing rolling …
I believe it was the beginning of 2008 when my husband Drew and I fell into going poly after 16 years of monogamy. The decision was not made deliberately; it resulted from the realization that both of us were Dominants and would want to have our own submissives. While I myself was not sexually involved with MY submissives (for some years to come), my hubby most certainly expected to be!
Now that left us staring at a rather huge lifestyle change – 16 years of monogamy is a looong time of being only with each other, of established relationship patterns, interactions, bonding, knowing the other, etc. All those little things that make a longterm relationship special and sacred to the partners involved, that we generally do not even think about because they just are, the comfort and safety we have and derive from our partner, the knowledge that this person will always put you first in their lives.
That, and a gazillion other impacts, small and large, that the lifestyle change would bring with it sent us on a journey we did not expect or anticipated. Our bond was tested and stretched to its limits: tears, rage, emotional high-jacking, fear, insecurities, jealousy, mistrust … it was a very hard journey to go from Monogamy to Polyamory, and it took me three years to get from one to the other. Yeah, you read that right: ME. Drew had absolutely no problem switching from one to the other, the work that had to be done was all mine to do.
The very first soft-skill class I ever put together and taught was an accounting of my journey from monogamy to polyamory, and the hell I went through to get from one to the other. There was nothing easy about it, and it took a great deal of guts to even try. Without the patience and love of my husband I would not have made it. We are programmed and socialized to be monogamous, and it takes a tremendous amount of work, will power and discipline to get rid of that programing and the associated shame, guilt and stigma of NOT being monogamous.
The following years up to today were filled with many growth opportunities, and I truly believe that the experiences we have gone through have made us a better couple and better individuals. Between various partners, both single and a married couple, various age groups, many experience levels, we learned on the job what it means – and TAKES – to be polyamorus and in Power Exchange relationships. There are plenty of stories to come your way.
“Well, Ms. Cenna, thanks for sharing and all, but why are you telling me this”?
Here is the thing: As you see in the banner, I am stating that I (Alternative Lifestyle Education or A.L.E.) teach Relationship Skills for Polyamory and Consensual Power Exchange. You, as the recipient, may ask yourself who the hell *I* am to go around and presume to teach others? That’s rather presumptuous, isn’t it? Maybe … maybe not. 😉
Since 2008 I have been in 10 Consensual Power Exchange Relationships (at one point with 4 submissives simultaneously), some of which were pure P/E, no sexual or emotional interaction; some of which involved emotional but not sexual polyamory, some of which involved all of the above. Additionally I have had a couple of FWB situations over the years, I am married to a Dominant (can you say Dual-Dom Household?), I am running a Leather Household, I am raising my child, I have mentored a few new submissives into the lifestyle, and am asked for advice and council by my peers.
My point? I know stuff about relationships. I have learned the hard way (its the only way I know how), and I have accumulated knowledge that I need and want to share. Trust me – if anything within any kind of relationship can go wrong – I have been there, done that, and wish I did not have the damn T-Shirt. I want to share my experiences with my fellow kinksters and perverts, and hopefully prevent some of the mistakes I made from happening to you. Idealistic? Perhaps … but worth trying.
Alright … so what are you doing?
At this point in my journey, I have earned some credibility as an educator in my field not only in Texas and Oklahoma, but also the national presenter circuit, have been involved in various educational organizations in leadership positions over the years, have been asked to judge contests, and actively teach relationship skills within the Polyamory and Consensual Power Exchange dynamics all over the country (well – when we are not actively staying at home anyway … ), and my Community saw it fit to present me with a Master’s Cover in 2019. That sort of thing comes with implied responsibility, wanted or not.
Since I found myself stuck at home since South Pains Leatherfest, I have been taking a great deal of classes, webinars, learned new software packages (still am), and started building some online classes. All of this takes a GREAT deal of time and energy, and it has not gone as quickly as I wish. However, while I work on all of that stuff, I want to at least start my Newsletter, to get in the weekly habit of connecting with you guys, of letting you into my life and show you some of my perspectives and thought processes.
Each week I will tell you a story out of my life since 2008, give you a piece of one of my classes that is relevant to the story told, offer some links for you to explore if you so choose (also related), and perhaps leave you with some questions to consider and mull over for yourself and/or your relationship.
I am setting up a Document Depository (probably DropBox) to upload some files and other things for you to download, and I will provide links to those via this weekly missive. It will take a little time, but it WILL get done. Once I get the online classes going, I will let you know where to go and either take them at your leisure (self-paced) or sign up for live ones. I have a lot of ideas and plans … we shall see if I have the energy for all of them. 🙂
Can I legally stalk you?!?
I have a standing website you can visit here, it has a some information about myself, the classes I teach in person, and the events I will be at in the near future (although there are an awful lot of cancellations right now …). It also has a link to my Virtual School portal, although nothing is there yet other than a “construction sign”.
For more interactive stalking, you can find me on Facebook as MsCenna Austin. I also have a business page there, Alternative Lifestyle Education. Of course, there is also always the good’ol email option!
There – the first Newsletter is out the door! What did you think? I am very much inviting you to give me feed-back, suggestions or questions, or any other information you think I should have. Just hit ‘reply’ and go for it!
Go ye forth and be kinky – but stay safe!